Italy Scrapping “Fidelity” in Marriage Vows. Viva Italia!

I love Italy.  Sure 93 governments in 60 years or some such staggering lack of stability, but they know La Dolce Vita, certamente!

If they pass this law you will not have to promise to be faithful anymore in Italian vows.

The thing I admire is that they recognize that extramarital fun time happens (55% of men and 33% of women admitted to cheating in a 2013 Italian poll) and it alone shouldn’t break up a marriage, legally.

The promise not to cheat is a “cultural legacy from an outdated and obsolete vision of marriage, family, and the rights and duties of spouses”, according to the senators who have signed the bill.

They cited a previous ruling from Italy’s top court, which declared that judges could not legally place the blame for a marriage separation “on the mere failure to observe the duty of fidelity”.

Instead, the other party has to prove that their spouse’s infidelity led to the irreconcilable breakdown of the marriage.

Historically, fidelity wasn’t just about the evil of the penis or the vagina wanting a little variety (and they do), it came down to the legitimacy of the children (so just the evil vagina, really).  But that not being a thing anymore, it does come down to getting a hall pass for some avventura.

The senators assert that fidelity should not be thought of only in sexual terms, but also in terms of “trust and respect”, and that while it was an “important value”, it should not be up to the State to impose it by law.

I fully expect that in America we could be up to like 50% of the country in open marriages, and 100% “cheating” and we’d persist in pushing the quaint idea of fidelity for a lifetime as a goal, because that’s what we do.

I don’t like the term “cheating” in regards to sex because it connotes getting something you do not deserve, by underhanded means.  Everybody deserves sex and the means are rarely all that dishonorable.  Everything’s negotiable, si? ♥

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